Why I left the New Age movement and came back to Jesus

The New Age movement has experienced a boom in recent years. More and more women are now openly participating in spiritual practices once considered taboo.

Full moon rituals, Tarot cards, and crystals aren’t limited to witches and fortune tellers anymore.

But all that glitters is not gold.

I’m here to warn you against the New Age movement so that you will not be deceived like I was.

Here’s the story of how I went from backslid Christian to manifestation coach to Christian blogger.

Why I left the New Age movement and came back to Jesus

I grew up in the Christian church and backslid a time or two (or three or four).

In 2016, I slowly (and somewhat unknowingly) became a part of the New Age movement.

What started out small ended up becoming an idol that consumed me for a solid 2 1/2 years.

I went from vision boards and affirmations to teaching about chakras and energy healing.

Because I drew the line at things like Tarot card readings and seances, I told myself I would be fine.

I still called myself a Christian but was listening to false teachers who preach the prosperity gospel. I then became a manifestation coach and author myself.

Deep down I knew that some of what I was repeating wasn’t completely in line with scripture. But the prosperity gospel sounds so good that you want to believe it.

I loved (almost) everything about the New Age world and the so-called “spiritual” coaches, leaders and gurus.

I lapped it all up and felt special and excited to experience a spiritual awakening and to be able to enlighten others.

I truly believed that I needed to share this sacred information with others. I wanted them to be able to experience the sense of power and enlightenment I was feeling.

Which was awesome, minus the noticeable increase in anxiety, fatigue, and bad dreams which I now believe are of demonic origin.

It wasn’t until I came across this article by Doreen Virtue that God began to open my eyes to the dangers of the New Age movement.

Even still, I didn’t fully quit teaching manifestation until months later. 

My manifestation coaching business was not successful despite 17 months of sheer dedication and over $10,000 in investments.

I thank God for this now because looking back I can see that He couldn’t bless it because it was not His will for me.

Walking away from my business (which I truly loved) would have been so much harder had it been monetarily successful.

The Bible says that teachers will be judged more harshly (James 3:1), and so the longer my disobedience continued the worse off I would have been.

The warning signs were all there

The Bible warns of false teachers and wolves in sheep’s clothing (Matthew 7:15), as well as the Enemy’s intent to devour us (1 Peter 5:8).

Many times it forbids witchcraft, fortune telling, and the like.

And while there are verses that appear to support manifestation (such as Matthew 21:22), they are only intended for believers through faith and prayer if what they are asking for lines up with God’s will.

When we tell God what to do we’re being God.

He’s not a genie in the sky waiting to grant our wishes.

We are to humbly serve Him and boldly make requests through prayer and petition.

We are to learn, as Paul did, how to be content in all things (Philippians 4:11-13).

Not to focus on our own selfish desires and prioritize what our flesh craves over obedience to His word.

Satan is using the new age movement to destroy women in particular

In Genesis 3 the serpent (Satan) tempted Eve to eat the forbidden fruit from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil so that her eyes would be opened.

As we all know, she was deceived and this became the first sin. She then went on to coax her husband Adam to follow suit. And God punished mankind for this.

What happened to me (and what I have witnessed happen to many others), was that I was deceived and lured in.

My participation in New Age practices opened my eyes to hidden knowledge I now believe we humans were NEVER meant to have.

This knowledge took me further away from God because it put me in the drivers seat instead of God.

It caused me to rely on my own strength and believe in things that the Bible says are evil.

And then, just like Adam and Eve, I shared this knowledge with my husband who then followed suit.

Others in my “spiritual” circles did the same. In many instances their relationships ended when the man wouldn’t get on board with the woman’s new “spiritual” path.

This is a win-win for Satan who seeks to steal, kill and destroy (John 10:10).

The New Age movement is darkness disguised as light

“Love and light” is a common New Age term that feels good.

In fact, all that is taught sounds positive, as it focuses on love and forgiveness and abundance.

There is also a strong emphasis on releasing old wounds to heal parts of ourselves from trauma, and raising our vibration to become more like God.

Many who are drawn to the New Age movement experienced sexual, mental, physical and/or emotional abuse in their childhood and/or as a young adult.

The allure of being able to rise above this abuse where we are the ones in control is very strong.

We feel empowered, and can become addicted to that feeling.  

Then for many of us, the dark and unpleasant symptoms of our “spiritual awakenings” begin to pop up.

But we are told that it is all part of the journey to enlightenment. That this must happen so that we can live at a higher vibration and be more like God.

This process is typically followed by the “dark night of the soul” where we can feel completely separated from God for a time.

Empty. Alone. Tormented. (aka right where Satan wants us.)

And if we survive this–I imagine some people commit suicide at this point–we are told that we will reach enlightenment and inner peace.

But of course that is a lie, because Satan is the father of lies (John 8:44) and masquerades as an angel of light (2 Corinthians 11:14-15).

On the other hand, Jesus is the prince of peace (Isaiah 9:6) and the way, the truth, and the life (John 14:6).


My heart hurts for those who are being deceived and are still actively participating in the New Age movement.

I know many of them are kind souls who don’t yet understand that they are committing wickedness in His eyes.

Others have publicly renounced the Christian faith in favor of the religion of “love” or “all religions”.

My hope and prayer is that God will use me to spread the truth of the New Age movement.

Romans 8:28 says that God uses all things for good for those who love Him and I believe that includes our mistakes. I am now uniquely qualified to help others turn away from the New Age movement like I did.

I know this information can be difficult to read if you are still wrapped up in the New Age world. It took me months after reading the Doreen Virtue article to be able to walk away. It was not easy and I still struggle over having this forbidden knowledge because I cannot unlearn it.

But there is hope and freedom in Jesus when we repent and turn from our sin.


How to overcome suicidal thoughts with Biblical truths

hopeless woman experiencing suicidal thoughts

If you are having suicidal thoughts, you are likely under spiritual attack which means it’s time for spiritual warfare.

Ephesians 6:12 says, “For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.”

Satan actively seeks to destroy lives while Jesus seeks to fulfill them (John 10:10).

And what better way for Satan to destroy our lives than to convince us that life isn’t worth living?

The good news is that we can combat and overcome suicidal thoughts with Biblical truths.

(NOTE: If you are in crisis, please get help by calling the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 (TALK) or by clicking here to chat.)

Because even though we face trials and may experience spiritual attacks on earth, as Believers we have victory in Jesus.

Here are some common lies Satan tells us (which can lead to suicidal thoughts), along with the Biblical truths and verses to combat them:

Lie 1: No one loves me / no one will ever love me

Truth: God loves you and always will.

For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.

Psalm 139:13-14 (NIV)

At our core, each of us just wants to be loved. And God created us that way because He seeks to draw us closer to Him in order to fill that void. He will never leave us nor forsake us.

If we were all able to see ourselves through His eyes, there would be no more self-doubt, self-loathing, self-consciousness or self-hatred.

We are His precious creation and He delights in us (Psalm 18:19).

In fact, He loves us so much that He sent His son to die for us (John 3:16) while we were still sinners (Romans 5:8).

Lie 2: It’s all just too much / I just can’t anymore

Truth: We can do all things through Christ who strengthens us (Phil. 4:13).

He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.

Isaiah 40:29-31

We all feel like giving up sometimes. Life can be hard, and it can feel like too much at times.

But the good news is that God never expects us to handle it alone.

He wants us to turn to Him and rely on His strength to get us through the tough days so that we can face tomorrow.

Don’t give up!

Lie 3: The world would be better off without me

Truth: You were created for a purpose and you are meant to be here.

For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.

Ephesians 2:10 (NIV)

No matter how big you’ve screwed up or how insignificant you may feel, you are here for a reason.

God doesn’t make mistakes.

If the world would be better off without you, you wouldn’t have been created and you wouldn’t be here now.

Your time is not up yet.

Lie 4: It’s just not worth it / I should just give up

Truth: God has a plan, and it will all be worth it in the end.

Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him.

James 1:12

Giving up when times are tough can feel like the easy out. But there is hope.

We are to cast our cares on Him (1 Peter 5:7), and He will deliver us from evil (Matthew 6:13).

Lie 5: No one understands / I feel so alone

Truth: God understands, and you are never alone.

This is my command—be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.

Joshua 1:9 (NLT)

Satan loves to isolate us, because that’s where he can do his best work.

Sharing that you are having suicidal thoughts with others can be frightening, but you are not alone. The joy of the Lord is our strength (Nehemiah 8:10).

Lie 6: I just don’t want to feel this way anymore / this pain is too much to bear

Truth: The way you are feeling now will not last forever.

When the righteous cry for help, the Lord hears and delivers them out of all their troubles. The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

Psalm 34:17-18 (NIV)

As someone who has struggled with depression, anxiety, and suicidal thoughts off and on since I was a teenager, I understand.

Things can be so difficult and painful that life no longer feels worth living. Hope can feel far off.

But God never gives us any challenge that is too great to handle without His help. Turn to Him for strength, and be patient.

God never gives us any challenge that is too great to handle without His help. Turn to Him for strength, and be patient.

Lie 7: Things are never going to get better / I will never catch a break

Truth: God has a plan.

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.

Jeremiah 29:11

It’s human nature to assume the worst. And when things are hard and we’re feeling hopeless, it’s difficult to imagine them ever getting better.

But God’s promises never fail. He wants us to put our complete hope and trust in Him. To believe with all of our heart and soul that He knows what’s best for us and will guide us according to His will.

God’s promises never fail. He wants us to put our complete hope and trust in Him. To believe with all of our heart and soul that He knows what’s best for us and will guide us according to His will.

Lie 8: It’s hopeless / God doesn’t care

Truth: God hears our cries and He is our hope.

I waited patiently for the LORD to help me, and he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the pit of despair, out of the mud and the mire. He set my feet on solid ground and steadied me as I walked along.

Psalm 40:1-2

God cares about us so much that He collects all of our tears (Psalm 56:8). He encourages us countless times in His word not to fear, not to give up, and not to despair.

Closing prayer

Father God,

We know you see our struggles and hear our innermost thoughts and fears. Please deliver us from evil and give us hope.

Let us look to you for guidance and lean not on our own understanding. Let us have faith and trust in you and your will for our lives.

Give us the strength to endure and overcome the trials we are facing.

We bind up any suicidal thoughts and pray protection and renewal over our minds.

In your son’s name we pray,